ANGRY TUESDAY

Heather keeps BITCHING at me to write a blog. I am NOT going to do it. I don't care. Nobody wants to hear about my stupid boring life and my stupid boring marriage. What am I supposed to write anyway? I'm sure entry after entry of just "I HATE EVERYBODY" would get old after a while but that's basically all I have to say.

My husband pisses me off. We'll call him Crapstick. HA. My employees piss me off. My boss pisses me off. Heather pisses me off too but I'd never tell her so because she'd get all butt-hurt and then not talk to me. She gets all fucking touchy sometimes. I like to play Mafia Wars.

So tomorrow is the anniversary of three years of being married to Crapstick. He's going to want to get laid or something and I had totally intended to just lie there and suffer through it but then OF COURSE I got my period. It's been so long since I've had one of these that I got scared when I saw it. I actually thought for a minute I had somehow cut myself with toilet paper and was bleeding out my ass!

WHAT?

Heather TOLD you this blog was R-rated!

So then I called Heather up and told her all about it but she was too busy getting all fucking wishy washy about some issues she managed to resolve with her family. BO-RING! While I was ignoring her I thought about swimming outside because Crapstick just put up a doughboy in the backyard (only set us back a hundred dollars FUCK YEAH!) and I wanted to take a little dip and then I actually thought "can I go swimming when I'm on my period?" Like what is this, fucking Teen Beat? Jesus. Flashback to fucking middle school. Told Heather about it. She laughed at me. HAHAHA YEAH REAL FUNNY! Bitch.

I'm going to go play some more Mafia Wars.